Comfort Zone

A few weeks ago, I tried a drop-back by myself. It's when you go from standing and literally "drop back" into wheel. I've done this several times with a spot, namely Bruce who always says, "You don't need me." So, I thought what the hell, maybe I don't need him. Well, I made it down there but I went down really quickly and my hands hit the ground too fast. I know this because I jammed my back and it hurt for two days. Now I'm scared to do it alone.

So then one day in Hannah's class I came up to standing from wheel and she asked if I could go back. I told her my story of trying it on my own and the class was really crowded so she said maybe we could work on it some other time. So on Saturday after class, I asked her what the key was. She explained some mechanics to me and the tricks are getting into your legs, squeezing your shins in, puffing up in the chest and getting the deepest backbend you can before you reach your arms above your head to go back.

Okay, so then I went to her class yesterday and we were doing some stuff against the wall. She asked me to demonstrate the back-drop with her help. My whole body was shaking. I think I was nervous because everyone was staring at me. I usually don't get nervous when I demonstrate poses but I think it's because I'm usually demonstrating poses that I'm comfortable in. Wheel-no problem; forearm stand-I've got you covered; camel-bring it on; dropback-I'm scared as hell.

Anyway, it was a lesson for me in getting out of my comfort zone in yoga class, a setting where I usually feel very at home. Good times.

My generation

I went to Hannah's yoga class last night. Picture me getting my ass kicked all over Bodhi's studio and you will have a clear image of what the class was like. At first I thought she might be in a really bad mood or mad at us or something. I think she gets frustrated that many yoga students, or people in general, don't listen. The style of yoga she's teaching involves very different principles than the styles that most long-term yoga students have learned, myself included. They get used to doing and hearing the same things in every class so when a teacher with a different style comes in, the students don't listen and just revert back to what they know. But that's the nature of people, right, so I think you just have to adapt to that and be patient. I will say that since I've been learning these alignment principles of Anusara yoga, my practice has exploded and I can do things I never could before.

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Have you seen that commercial for Chase Bank where a wife walks into her den and says to her husband, "You're right. We need a new tv." Then you hear Queen's "I Want it All" and it cuts to the husband at an electronic store looking at the biggest television any human could view with his or her own eyes. Well, that song came on in my spin class yesterday and I thought about that commercial. I also thought that should be the theme song for my generation. We want what it took our parents 20 years to get. The big, new, fancy house; the coolest cars; the best gadgets, etc.

I see this especially when I go back home to Monroe. There are people my age living in "starter homes" that make my home look like a trailer. The cost of living is much cheaper there, yes, but I'm talking top-of-the-line appliances, flooring, decorations, you name it. It's like a competition there. A lot of these people were given things when they younger, so you might expect that they would acquire nice things as adults. But I also see it in my group of friends that I'm closest with now, and most of them worked and paid their own through college and didn't have everything handed to them.

My friend Joanna told me that she thought Cody and I were the least materialistic out of our entire group. She might be right, but we certainly do like nice things and we have the consolidated debt to prove it. But we have learned what we can and cannot have.

Sometimes I go home to my parents' house and they have bought a new big screen television or renovated something on the house or they take a trip to Vegas. They never did these things when we were growing up. I have come to realize that this is their time. Both of their kids are out of the house and married, so they should be able to do the things that they want. I hope that we can tell our children that their time will come eventually, but that the "I Want it All" mentality won't fly in our house.

CEOs

My parents left this morning after being here all weekend. I cannot tell you how much we ate. It seems like that's all we did. I feel very bloated and weighted down today plus I didn't sleep well last night so I'm tired on top of everything. I did manage to go running today and that helped.

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I go to a very nontraditional church that Cody and I both really like. They geared their Easter service to appeal to people who don't normally attend church. The theme of the service was the story of the prodigal son through the music of U2. That's right, U2. I wasn't really sure what to expect, but what I wasn't expecting was an utterly amazing experience. I typically enjoy the services at church, but this one took the cake. John, the lead pastor, spoke briefly, but the majority of the service was basically a musical that portrayed the struggles of a daughter who leaves home at a young age, moves to the big city, and hits the streets. Unsure of whether her father would take her back after being gone for a while, she returns home to find him waiting for her with open arms. The actors were both ridiculously great singers, but the girl was out of this world. She was amazing. I can't stop thinking about it. The church band played all of the music and I swear, some of the best musicians in Austin stand up on that stage every week. Everything about the church makes me proud to be a part of it. The leaders have found a wonderful way to reach young people and to teach them that you can attend church, enjoy it, learn, and even *gasp* ask questions. Who knew?

Ma & Pa

Once again, the weather in Austin is absolutely gorgeous! And once again, I want to get shitfaced by drinking margaritas. But not today. My parents will be in town tomorrow for Easter weekend so I need to get my house together. That's pretty much all I have to say today. Oh, I haven't seen the lizard lately but I have a feeling he'll be out this evening on this glorious day!

Money woes

Happy St. Patty's day! Yes, I'm wearing green and no, I'm not at Fado's drinking a pint of Guiness. Although the bar opened at like 6:00 this morning so I'm sure by now there are lots of people there.

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Money is tight these days and it shows. I haven't been doing much catering lately because I've figured that people are too broke to hire the most expensive caterer in town, so very little extra money has been coming in. The price of gas is hitting me hard and yet I have two very long driving trips planned in the next two months. Actually, I have a very busy spring coming up and I'm not sure how I'm going to afford to do it all, but I'm sure going to try. There are probably things I could give up to allow for more cash flow, but I'm not willing to.

I woke up at 4:00 this morning stressing about money. I laid there for about an hour listening to my cat Lokey purr. He lays on my pillow as if it his own. I don't mind until he starts playing with my hair. This morning, he put his paw in between my face and my hand trying to get to a strand of hair that was there. I'm such a sucker because it's annoying as hell but he's so damn cute. Plus he's relentless. I'll push him down by my feet and he just comes right back.

Anyway, the moral of the story is that I wish all I had to worry about was playing with my owner's hair. Must be nice.

Day off

I took the day off because it's spring break and there is absolutely no one at the University. Contrary to popular belief, the administration does not get off the week of spring break, but many employees take off. So I and my coworkers decided that we would take off as well. I checked my email from home and I got maybe five emails, so taking the time off was time well spent.

I got up this morning and went running and then went to Hannah's class at Bodhi. Ummm...probably not the best idea. Her Anusuara style of teaching is killer on the quads on a normal day, not to mention on a day when you've gone running an hour before the class starts. We did camel against the mirrors and then she asked if I would demonstrate a one-armed camel. The camel where you put one hand either on your heel or calf and then you get really strong through the legs and reach your other arm up and then you coil back and maybe your reaching arm touches the floor. Yeah. So I did it...on both sides. Backbends are fairly easy for me, but since I've been encorporating these Anusara principles into my practice...and this is sort of weird, they have become easier and yet harder at the same time. Needless to say, I left the class with my quads on freakin' fire. It was awesome.

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I'm afraid of lizards but there is this lizard that hangs out on our big trash can outside and I want to like him. Interestlingly enough, he's not around when it's cold; I guess they don't like the cold, but every single spring, he comes around. I know it's the same lizard. So, today, I took the trash out and he was there. He scared me at first. And I think he's more scared of me than I am of him. I don't want the little guy to be afraid of me. I need to not be afraid of him. I'm going to try and form a relationship with him. I'll keep you posted.

Spring Break

This week is Spring Break for the University and even though many people think that the administration is off like the students and faculty are, we are not. But you wouldn't guess it if you were to walk down the halls. There is no one here, which is why I will not be coming to work tomorrow. Yay!

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I literally got sick to my stomach when I saw the price of gas a few days ago. It is now up to $3.15 a gallon around my house. What the? I just can't even believe it. That alone is enough to put this country in a recession. And no doubt about it, we are in a recession. The government can call it whatever they want.

Drunken promises

I was kind of drunk on Friday when I wrote that last blog. But I'm a woman of my word. I have always defended Hillary Clinton when voters, like my mother, say things like, "I don't know. I just don't like her." Now, I did not vote for Hillary in the primary, but I've never felt like this was a reason not to vote for her. If you disagree with her politics, then fine, but just because you don't like her? I've never understood that. Take a conversation I had with my mother in the fall. I said, "Well, what exactly don't you like about her, Mother?" Mom said, "I don't know. I just think she's evil." I said, "Have you ever actually listened to anything she has to say?" Mom said, "Well, maybe you're right. Maybe I've never taken the time to listen to her." I thought that I had miraculously gotten through to my mom. No dice. She recently said something similar to my sister.

But over the past few months, I have found myself getting incredibly annoyed with Hillary and I have just begun to see why people say that they won't vote for her because they just don't like her. Likeability is a huge factor come election time and she just doesn't have it. Not like Obama does anyway. And who is she to hint at the possibility of Obama as her running mate? Am I wrong or does he not have the most delegates and the popular vote at this moment?

Anyway, until the Democratic nominee is determined, the real winner is John McCain. He's just flapping his wings off into the sunset...laughing.

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The weather in Austin right now is absolutely fantastic! This kind of weather makes me want to go to the lake and get shitfaced by drinking margaritas.

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Do you know what my favorite part about losing weight is...other than being healthy, of course? Watching my arms get thinner. Is that vanity or what?

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Hey, Vanessa--did you hear that when you saw Paris Hilton with that fake sherpa dude, it was a big hoax for some show on E! Entertainment Television? Something about stars "punking" the paparazzi? It must be bizarre living in L.A.

Why blog?

My blogging has been so sporadic lately. I just read the last few blogs and they were about nothing substantive really. So, I'm committing to blogging a)at least three times a week and b)about something other than what I did last night. Right now, I'm drinking wine so it's not the best time to blog about something with substance but I promise you this. Soon, you will learn more than you wanted to know about my take on the current presidential race.