Ready?

Once again, Christmas has come and gone. This year was different for me since I'm pregnant and unable to drink copious amounts of wine and bourbon. (Although I did have one glass of wine on Christmas Eve and one on Christmas. Shhhhh.) The reality that this will be my last Christmas without a child has sunk in and I have suddenly become aware that not only will I have a child, but the child will also have me. The idea that someone is ever ready to be a parent is ludicrous to me. How can you be really ready to take care of another human being for the next 18 years of your life? I'll be almost 50 by then. This entire experience is a journey that I can't wrap my head around entirely and I'm not sure if I ever will.

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I'm still in Monroe at my parents' house. Before we left, our hot water heater broke and leaked under our floors. Yesterday morning, Cody told me that he really felt like he needed to go back home and work on them. I have to stay because my friends are giving me a baby shower today so he took Phoebe, our dog, and left and my mom is taking me back to Austin on Monday. I miss him. I miss my dog, too. I think Sam, my parents' dog, misses Phoebe, too. But I do love being at my parents' house. I'm sure I've said this before, but I find a comfort in it that I can not put into words. I didn't really grow up in this house because we moved here when I was 15 and I only lived here off and on during college, but I get this feeling of coziness when I'm here. If the house weren't located in Monroe, LA, I'd buy it in a heart beat!