Office Space

Am I the only person in the entire building at work who uses the Sparklets water fountain in the staff break room and then changes the water cooler? It seems like I change it out several times a week. If I'm changing it that often, then how often are other people changing it? I realize that many of the people who work in this building might be, how can I say this politely, not as able to lift the heavy water cooler as others are. If that's the case, then either a)don't use it, or b)ask someone to lift it for you. But my theory is that most of the people who use it are just really freakin lazy. If that's the case, then either a)don't use it, or b)don't use it. Does this sound like the antics of a disgruntled employee? I'm not disgruntled. I was disgruntled last month when I found that my Weight Watchers frozen lunch (yeah, it's a convenience thing) had been taken out of the freezer, heated up, eaten, and then thrown away in the trash right there in the break room. The thief didn't even try to hide it! I left a nice, but firm note on the freezer door just to let him or her know that his or her disrespect had not gone unnoticed.

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I really want to do some anusara yoga. Margaret was telling me that she's doing this Anusara Immersion at YogaYoga and she thinks I would benefit from it because I'm at a point in my practice where I probably need more. She's right. As much as I love the Vinyasa practice, it gets repetitive. I have been thinking a lot about trying other styles and Anusara seems like the next step. Here's the deal: if I try something new, I want it to be in addition to my vinyasa practice at Bodhi, not in replace of it. There are a few reasons that I can't bring myself to miss one of my classes at Bodhi to go somewhere else (I practice there about five times a week, so with work and life, it's not like I have a whole lot of extra time). Here are the reasons.
1-It is extremely convenient to my work. The only day I drive in to practice is on Saturday mornings.
2-I pay $145/month so I feel the need to get the most out of my money. Maybe that's not really a good reason, but that's a lot of money to me.
3-I'm loyal. This is probably the main reason I continue to practice there. I started practicing at a studio in Round Rock that isn't open anymore. At Creekside, I fell so in love with yoga that I wanted more, so I started researching other studios in town. Found Bodhi. End of story. Not really end of story. I have been to many other studios in town and I continued to attend classes at Creekside after I started going to Bodhi. I do attend workshops at other studios around town, but Bodhi is where I discovered the Vinyasa practice and where I became hooked. The teachers are all different in the ways that they teach, yet they are all equally awesome. *Sigh* What to do.

So, anyway, this Anusara Immersion is super expensive and I'm going on three trips in three months and then there's the holidays, and well, there's always something. But I'm at least going to try and take some classes here and there by the end of the year. It's like my practice is screaming for something new. I suppose I should start listening.

World Traveler

I have three trips planned in the next two months and although I'm super excited about each of them, I'm not quite sure who I think I am making all of these plans that will surely cost a fair amount of money. Actually, the most expensive part is the plane ticket. I'm going to Asheville, NC in less than a month to visit my friend Angie. I've already spent a fair amount of time with these friends three times this year and this trip will be the last for this year, so I'll take in every moment. Then my friend Meredith is getting married in September in Florida so I'm headed to the beach again. And this weekend Cody and I booked a trip to San Francisco for the end of September. Yay! I'd have to say that I'm probably most excited about this trip because one-I've never been to San Fran and two-Cody and I don't take many trips alone. We will spend one day with his sister and her new baby boy, but the rest of the time, we're just going to play. I can't stop thinking aobut it, which is too bad because I need to get to work!

Mom is so proud...

I got myself a 30th birthday present. Here is a pic. I got my first tattoo when I was 20 and have always wanted another one, so I figured my 30th birthday was as good a time as any. I'll have to say that my mother took it very well. I knew that my dad would just be like, "Well, whatever...nothing we can do about it now." But when my mom found out about my first one ten years ago, she cried. She was going through some hormonal stuff at the time, so that could have contributed to her reaction. I told them a few months ago that I wanted to get another one, but I don't think they thought I would ever actually do it. Guess they were wrong. Yes, it hurt. But I love it. That's all that matters.

Admitting is the first step

My birthday has come and gone and yet the celebrating still isn't over. Cody and I are going to eat sushi (yum, yum, I can't wait) tonight at Musashino with our friends Liz and Michael. It's really nice to have friends who are a couple and have many of the same interests that we have. We haven't really had that since we've been together and it's pretty cool. Then my parents and sister will be here on Saturday and we're headed to Vespaio for dinner. My parents think the restaurant is the greatest thing since sliced bread and since Cody is a chef there, we always get the mack daddy hook up. And then the celebration will be over. At least over for my birthday. Cody is getting baptized on Sunday and my parents are super excited, as am I. It's a decision he reached all on his own and I find him incredibly courageous for making it at this time in his life. I'm pretty freaking proud.

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I've figured out why I was blue the last few days. By the way, I was also in such a bad mood that my coworkers had to ask if they had done something to upset me. Anyway, here's the deal. I am adopted and have always known it. People always ask, "When did your parents tell you that you were adopted." Well, I've always known because they started explaining it to me, literally, as an infant. I do remember in elementary school, although I can't recall exactly what age, that I asked them how I had always known and they told me that they started telling me at a really young age. They didn't want to sit me down at age 15 and break the news. I think because of this explanation process they used, I have always been very secure in my adoptiveness-not a word, but you get the picture. I was legally theirs before I was even born and it was a closed adoption. I don't know anything about my birth parents except that they were in college and a couple and just weren't ready for a baby. I am my parents' daughter and frankly, no one else's. My sister is not adopted. My parents adopted me after years of trying to get pregnant and then my mom got pregnant with Mary. Funny, huh? And here's a note, please don't ever refer to someone as an "adopted child". I hate hearing that about other people. Who gives a shit?

Okay, so now adoptions are often done much differently than they were 30 years ago. I'm not sure of the statistics, but there are many open adoptions these days where the birth mother or parents (probably just the mother in most cases, but I believe in father's rights) meet the adopting parents and even have a relationship with the child they give up for adoption. I've never been a fan of this, but I haven't been through it myself so what do I know.

So, the older I get, the more often I think about my birth mother/parents around my birthday. It's a natural curiosity. Meeting my birth parents isn't going to fill any kind of void in my life. But the thought is there, and with my 30th just passing, the thought has been pretty strong for the past month probably. Then, my friends and I met up with an old friend (Jamie) while they were in Austin this weekend. Jamie's girlfriend Tammy had a son 12 years ago and she gave him up for adoption in an open adoption. She has a relationship with her son and his parents. She has pictures of him that she showed us and was obviously very proud, but she knows where she stands as his biological mother. After denying the fact, I finally admitted to myself that I was jealous. Jealous of the fact that this child has, what seems to be, a healthy relationship with the woman who gave birth to him and a wonderful relationship with his parents (this is based only on about 30 minutes of conversation with Tammy, so who knows really).

So, there you have it. I'm not really sure what to do with all of this. I just know that I spent a lot of the day yesterday wondering if my birth mother and father were thinking about their now 30-year old daughter and if they were hoping that I was doing well, as I was hoping and continue to hope for them.

Why so blue?

My friends were in town this weekend to help me celebrate my 30th, which is actually tomorrow, and we had a blast. I was so worn out on Sunday and even yesterday, that I found myself in an awfully bad mood yesterday. I think part of it is that I always get that way when I spend time with my friends and then that time is over. I think the other part is actually that my birthday is so close. I'm not afraid of turning 30...it's the new 20 or whatever. So, I haven't quite figured out what it is, but I do have a hunch and am working through it.

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My grandmother is having an angioplasty this week. She's 89 and has almost full blockage in all four of her arteries. I'm nervous, but she's not afraid of dying so I'm not afraid for her. I just pray that she will be strong and that her family will be strong for her.

What about your friends?

I found myself dancing a little jig this morning as I walked into work. Huh? I know. Considering I've been the uber procrastinator on many things my boss is expecting done by August 1st (yeah, right!), you would think that I would be concerned that today is the last day of my work week. But alas, I am picking up my friends from the airport on Thursday and I'm super pumped. They are each flying a long way just to help me celebrate my 30th bday (Yikes!), and I have to say that I'm feeling really special. We don't have super big plans, but I do have somewhat of a schedule lined up. Since Joanna will have to spend some time with her sister and her family, she'll miss out on a few things, but not the important part, like dinner on Friday night at Enoteca and then drinks afterward...somewhere. See, Cody and I never, and I mean never, go out and have drinks. We do our drinking at the hizouse. (Did I just say hizouse?). We have friends over for dinner or we go to friends' houses. But I'm sort of excited about having cocktails out somewhere. I'm really excited to show my friends around Austin. They've all been here, but it's been a really long time for Angie and Nicki used to live here, but oh my, how things have changed. I'd really like to go to Barton Springs on Friday, but I'm not sure if it will be open due to the massive amount of rain we've been getting and are supposed to get today and tomorrow.

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Been doing lots of really good yoga lately. I love Bodhi.